I n s p i r a t i o n

Wednesday, September 08, 2004

Wow! It's been forever since I last posted! Well, small wonder considering that my mom doesn't want internet in the house (afraid of what my siblings might do on the internet, I suppose^_^). No complaints, though. I had hoped to be able to use the local library's computers over the summer, but, as circumstances would have it, I was not allowed to do anything not "educational" at the library. It's rather funny, actually, considering how many people actually go to the library where I live...(not a large number, I assure you...) sighs Oh well.
The summer was relaxing and I managed to reach page 212 on my novel!! Yeah!! Finally reached the 200's!! Took me over a year complements of school work.... grumbles Well, I'm still not finished yet. Let's see how many pages I can write during my senior year...^_^
I don't really have too much to write about today. I was really just bored. I don't want to do homework even though I should... (much too lazy at the moment^_-) Well, I can't really think of what else to say... Oh well. I suppose I'll just go for now... TTFN

Elizabeth had a scream at 1:11 PM

Monday, May 17, 2004

You know, I've really been neglecting this blog... It's kind of sad really. I suppose I've been too busy going crazy during my junoir year to actually post anything^_^ Well, being crazy is not necessarily a bad thing... To tell the truth, my friends and without a doubt, my mom, would probably say, "How can you go crazy if you already were crazy?" My reply, of course, would be, "I know I'm crazy. It's a fact that can't be changed, but I'm proud of it." Obviously, it's not really answering their question, but... hey, a girl has to have some pride!

I really have to attempt to stop neglecting this blog; it's as bad as my old diaries. My entries become so sparse in those things that, after a while, I just give up. Well, I'm not that interesting of a person so what in the devil could I write about?

A lot.

Yeah, I seem boring and I'm really rather quiet in school. I don't stand out in a crowd. I'm not really pretty or athletic or intelligent; don't get me wrong, my grade are pretty darn good, but I don't feel knowledgable about my life or what I can do in life. Many people only know me as the quiet, polite, always happy and smiling girl. I mean, I do smile a lot because I see the bright side of things. I look at life and think, "Hey, things could be worse, so why should I worry about the problems in my life?" I just go on with life, accepting the bad times and appreciating the good times for they are the only things that really matter. What is life if one simply sits around moping about how bad their life is and how horrible their day was? You should be out enjoying life and trying to make the most of it. Sometimes circumstances will bring you down, believe me, even I, miss optomistic, have had my rough days. I would have to admit that I believe I was somewhat depressed last year. I still put on smiles for the rest of the world, though because I have this insane hope that my smiles will cause someone else to smile and perhaps make their day a little brighter. I still do that, but last year, I found myself crying on random days for no apparent reason. I did not feel excited or happy about much; in fact, I felt that I had somehow let down everyone around me and for me that's the worst possible feeling.

I realize now as I'm pulling myself from that hole I dug last year that my feelings were uncalled for. I am perfectly fine. The sun still rises at around six in the morning and still sets sometime before or after dinner. My life is still continuing and I'm trying to make the most of everyday. ((Well, I call spending time on the internet making the most of my day even though others may not^^)) I look back now and wonder why I ever let myself feel so down. I miss how I was in ninth grade. Yes, you might have called my a blind optomist at that time. I was almost always seen skipping, humming some cheerful tune (or a not so cheerful county song that had recently played on the radio that I just couldn't get out of my head^_~), smiling, or just having fun. I'm starting to gain some of that back, but it's not the same. Last year forced me to see the bad side of life. Well, the bad side doesn't really bug me. All I need to do is move on and learn from my mistakes and try to overcome the pains in the world.

This year is going much better even though it is hectic. I'll survive. (Oh no... I have that song in my head now...^_^). Well, I need to go. Have lots of stuff to do right now. Must go type a post for one of my crazy characters!!

Elizabeth had a scream at 1:33 PM

Friday, March 05, 2004

What I have written below, is what I have written in one of the avidgamer sites that I've joined. It was written in response to someone saying that they hate birthdays and also to someone else who replied that it was a way to become closer to dying. I replied with this:

I don't fear death. It's just another part of life which all must come to face. Our ancestors have done so, therefore we can handle it too. All we need to do is live for the present and cherish our lives despite all the times we think 'life sucks'. Death is inevitable, but birthdays are not simply another step towards death, but also towards life. We do grow older and as we do so, we become a little more powerful and a little wiser((a difficult task for me^_^ wisdom's not my speciality)). Another reason I think birthday's are great is that people acknowledge you more as your years increase. Being a teenager, many of your ideas are overlooked as unsophisticated and immature; people don't give you the priviledges of an adult. You don't have that power. Aging means you receive that respect and acknowledgement. So, birthday's aren't too bad.

I thought this was kind of nice, so I had to write it here also. It goes with the post I posted yesterday rather nicely. Well, see ya'.

Elizabeth had a scream at 8:17 AM

Thursday, March 04, 2004

Hey everyone!! Wow, I haven't been posted anything for awhile. I've always had writing issues when it comes to journals... I suppose I simply don't like writing about myself. Anyway, there hasn't been too much interesting in my life happening. I've collected nine of the Mars manga series, four of the Ranma, one of Demon Diary, both of the Girl Got Game mangas that are out, and six of the Kare Kano. I believe I've gone obsessive especially since my mom doesn't quite know that I'm spending so much 0_o I wonder what she'd say if she found out...

Apart from that, life in an all girl school isn't too bad. Life's been rather hectic recently, though, being a junior. It's a tough year, in general. But, oh well!! Do you think I really care about the difficulties in life? No, I most certainly do not! In fact, I'm an optimist (cowers as people attempt to strangle her for being so optimistic)and believe that no matter how hard life becomes, you simply have to keep your head high and walk tall through the difficulties. Believe me. For quite some time I thought I was loosing my optimism; I was somewhat depressed ((not completely because I continued to fight for my optimism!!)) last year and even for some of this year, but I realized it was because others were putting me down. Now, I think "what the heck". I don't have to listen to everyone else. If I'm content with life and they aren't, it doesn't mean that I should stop being myself just to be what they want me to be. ((Now my song fits in well^_^)) Therefore, I've regained my courage and know that there's always something better awaiting you in the future. So if your loosing hope and think that life just sucks, don't give up on it because you never know just what your future may have in store for you. Life will get better so cheer up and continue with your head held high because, if there's one thing people can't take from you unless you allow them to, it's your pride, your pride in yourself, your values, your accomplishments, and your personality. Don't let them go; once you do, you'll only end up miserable with the feeling of loss. Believe me. I almost lost everything I believed in by allowing others to affect me; I'm only fortunate to have discovered that before it was too late. Don't fall into such a trap. Be yourself and enjoy life!!

Wow! I just realized how deep that was. I ramble too much, I think. Well see ya' later. Let's just see if I can get into the habit of posting more often.

Elizabeth had a scream at 1:09 PM

Wednesday, January 21, 2004

Hey! I neglected to mention that my B-Day was last Sunday on the 18th!! Yeah for Cappys. Recently, I've been busy with exams... Tomorrow shall be the last day, yet it shall be one of the most difficult since it's my Latin AP exam... Time to memorize book one and book two of the Aeneid! Yeah! (feigned enthusiasm^_~). C'est la vie! At least we have a three day weekend coming up!! On Saturday, I'm going snow tubing!!! That's the highlight of the week!

I have to say this: Lord of the Rings needs to win best picture!! I truly do not care if they have a problem with fantasy films winning. The Lord of the Rings is a trilogy that would have seemed impossible to turn into a film, but Peter Jackson succeeded wonderfully (and, yes, I have read the books^_^). Go LOTR!!! Well, bye for now!

Elizabeth had a scream at 11:10 AM

Sunday, January 18, 2004

Yeah!! I finally have a blog with much thanks to my friend who knows so much more about html than I do, which isn't hard considering that I have hardly any html skills^_~ Thank you, Bailey!!!

Elizabeth had a scream at 5:25 AM